We needed to escape.
Just the two of us.
We needed time together to be us
and for us to have time together.
Hibiscus became our hideaway,
Rhododendron our neighbour.
We were free from judging eyes and instead,
the trees became our friends.
All was quiet.
All was well.
Just the two of us. ( / me)
For as long as I remember I’ve always loved escaping. Normally out of fear, there’s just part of my brain that needs to get out. Sometimes it’s as simple as locking myself in my bathroom and dancing to get my feelings out, other times I go missing for 2 and a half hours (long story don’t worry).
But then he came along.
There’s nothing like escaping with your favourite person, the person that you love and care about. Whether it’s late night runs to McDonalds or a last-minute trip to a gorgeous hotel, there’s just nothing like spending time with your bub.
I’d be lying if I said we didn’t do it a lot. The past month alone I’ve eaten far too many chicken nuggets and we’ve had two hotel getaways, yet it still doesn’t feel like we’ve seen each other. Nevertheless, being the absolute I-don’t-deserve-him honey that he is, Connor sprung the surprise of a hotel and spa trip and I was ready.
Firstly, the hotel was beautiful. As soon as we hit the little road leading up to it, everything fell quiet. Apart from my fabulous music choices (the Harry Potter soundtrack to be precise) and Connor’s car humming along, there wasn’t much more than the faint rustling of trees and the wedding reception taking place on the grounds to greet us.
In our room we were met with champagne and strawberries (which Connor was a big fan of) and quite possibly the best pillows in a hotel room that we’ve ever experienced (I am V fussy about pillow plumpness but A+ Rowhill ya did good). I could spend forever talking about the bathroom (yes I did just say that) but if this stay told me anything, it’s that I have a thing for freestanding baths and sinks.
NOW THIS MIGHT ALL SEEM LIKE CHAMPERS AND MASSAGES BUT…
Not wanting to drag up the past but 2015 has been blocked from my memory. I veeeeery briefly touch on this in an oncoming post but I’ll keep it short – some boys are right dickheads, especially exes. I was isolated, under fire and blinded by a bad person that I believed was everything. Flashback to 2017 and history is slowly repeating itself – minus the blinded by a bad person bit (if you couldn’t already tell by the countless instagram captions, Connor is incredible). But the rest still stands.
And this time, it’s to both of us.
It’s weird coming under fire for spending time with someone.
Especially the person you’re with.
It’s made even worse when the simple act of wanting to sit next to each other results in your boyfriend being painted as a bad person. Now I won’t lie, I’m angry. I’m angry that a wonderful stay has almost been tainted by the idea that it might become the centre of a conversation slating the person I love. I’m angry that Connor’s being seen in this way. And I’m angry that it’s even got to this point.
Best friends, people that hardly know you and people that you trust – hearing them ‘supposedly’ (I say supposedly because god bloody knows who has actually told the truth) slate the person you’re with and the fundamental basics of a relationship, is frustrating. And what’s worse is that there’s literally no way to avoid it.
But I’ve had enough.
“SURROUND YOURSELF WITH PEOPLE AS INVESTED IN YOUR HAPPINESS, AS YOU ARE IN THEIRS”
I used to be so hung up on what people thought about the person I was with, to the point where I completely ignored everything and everyone, including myself. But not anymore.
And the end of the day, it is Connor and I.
Bubba and Butthead.
We like to escape.
Just the two of us.
And there is and never will be anything wrong with that.